The Queen. The Queen. The Queen…..

Moving to London I had decided there were a few key things I needed to do to ensure I really settled into UK life. See the Queen. Check. Go to a fancy horse race, fall asleep before seeing an actual horse and walk through London covered in wine and vomit. Check and check!!!!

First things first, THE QUEEEN.

I got up super early on a Saturday and made my way to Buckingham Place and lined up with loads of people to catch a glimpse of the Royal Family. Now I’d only ever seen this on the news, back home, and the Royal Wedding didn’t interest me. So I didn’t really understand the process of events and parades that involved the Royal Family.

The Queen
The Queen

It was only by chance that I even found out about “Trooping Colours” from a friend, so I decided to tag along. She had indicated it started at 10:30, so I figured meeting at 9:30 would be heaps of time, haha boy was I wrong.  We met at 8:45am and even then the streets were packed with people. We made our way down Pall Mall and were basically positioned right outside to the right of the palace (looking at the palace) along with people from every country imaginable. I didn’t realise people from France and other places even cared about the Queen, I’m so uniformed.

So after about a 1.5 hour wait, the parade finally started. Loads of soldiers and guards and men on horse playing drums, and tons of other men/women on horse, doing other random things.  Then finally we see three open carriages with Katherine, Harry and Camilla in one and the other two filled with Beatrice and whoever she is related to, and the last one some dude with his wife and small child (god my knowledge on the Royals is amazing). And about 30mins later the Queen finally emerges in a covered horse carriage, with Prince Charles and William on horseback after it.

It’s all over in a matter of seconds. Not even long enough to get a decent picture. So we’ve seen the Queen, surely it’s all over soon. NO WAY!!!! The parade goes for a further 4 hours through the streets of London. I was not prepared for this, and did not bring enough food for this. So yep, you guessed it, Bec got hungry, and we all know what happens then……..

The Queen finally comes back, and they do the balcony wave, and then the awesome fly pass happens. This was actually the highlight of my day. These jets are massive and they fly so close together, and so close to the ground, it’s actually quite incredible. Really was worth the growling tummy just for that.

So there you have it, I’ve now seen the Queen, and been one of those people who line the streets and wave a union jack flag and cheer for the Queen. Next up…….


Ascot was sold to me as drinking, horse races, and the Royal Family. It has quite a strict dress code, and rules about length of your dress, and how small your hat can be. After doing some research and realising I wouldn’t be sitting with the Queen (damn it), all those rules don’t apply for us. So the further down the food chain you get, the further the dress code goes south, and you end up with pretty much no dress code.

Out the front of Ascot
Out the front of Ascot

I had also been warned it was going to be a long day so pack a spare pair of shoes, and ensure I ate plenty of food. The day started well before 6am in order for my housemates and me to actually make it to the bust to take us out to Ascot at 8:45am.

It was a grossly cold and rainy day, so I had as usual wished I’d warn warmer clothes, though I definitely wore too many for some of the girls there. We arrived at Ascot at around 11am and that’s when it all turned sour. Hello Champagne, wine, champagne, wine, champagne, wine, you get the picture. And with even eating lunch and snacking on other bits and pieces, I was definitely living up to the Australian stereotype attached to race day.

At 2:30pm the Queen rode past in an open carriage. I have no idea why they make her ride past the coach (trailer park) in order to actually get to her seat. I bet she was impressed with the sights she saw.  Because we wanted to see the Queen, we actually missed the first race, so we got into Ascot around 3pm. After a few more wines, and some general chit chat, the last thing I remember is talking to some Whelsh guys (which mind you I had no freaking idea what they were saying, they were basically singing their words) and telling my housemate I needed to go to bed. Next thing I’m woken up by security telling my housemate “she can’t sleep here”.

Looking classy
Looking classy

For those of you who know me well, know that I love Kath and Kim (aussie tv show, basically making fun of bogan Australians) and well you know that episode when they go to Melbourne cup, and lose all their sh*t and stumble around like a bunch of lunatics? Well that was pretty much me. I basically walked out of Ascot at 4pm with no shoes, no fascinator, and no sunglasses. Left over wine all down my clothes, and basically telling my housemate “I’m not normally like this”, hahahah I’m all class.

I had gone to Ascot thinking, “hmmm maybe I’ll meet my rich husband here today”, and well if I did, I’m sure to have made a first impression on him, haha.

So back at the bus, I proceeded to remove every ounce of wine and food out of my system, and fall asleep on the bus. I only woke up when we arrived in London 5hours later. Best sleep ever in a short skirt, and on two seats.  Thankfully I have housemates who cover me towels, and make me look like sleeping beauty.

Arriving back in London, I was like “yes home time”, no Rebecca NO. You still have another 1hour journey till you get home. Oh city living. You’re killing me. So I trekked through the centre of London in my classy Ascot outfit, complete with added grass stains, and wine patches.

The next day, I came to realise, my housemates are pretty much my guardian angels, and had collected my shoes, fascinator and sunglasses for me.

So that was Ascot. Didn’t bet on a horse or even see a horse… I bet I’ve made you proud MUM 😉

Peace out for now


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